"To capture another's heart we must first capture our own" - Brett Blumental

 

Relationships are tricky and today's dating scene doesn't make it any easier. Many of us experience a push-pull dynamic around dating - we crave connection but we keep people at arms length, limited by our own fears. We blow chances or we settle for less than we hope for.

I warmly invite you to be yourself, to shine, to love yourself, body and soul. Authenticity evokes connection. Confidence evokes respect and admiration. That's what this work is all about.

I can help you:

  • Be relaxed and clear-headed on your next date.
  • Feel inherently valuable, loveable, and beautiful.
  • Have an intuitive sense of the values and motivation of the people you meet.
  • Invite emotional connection and "chemistry" without playing games or feeling exposed.

And the best thing is that it's not a method, not a facade, but simply you... comfortable in your own skin, your most radiant self.

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Your First Session

Hamish3a-250x250I've been blessed with a warm and open disposition - it's easy for me find rapport, offer kindness, and genuinely like the people I meet. People feel good around me. This therapeutic relationship sets a baseline for what you can expect (and should demand) from a romantic relationship.

The setting, and the work will create for you a "lived experience" of feeling accepted, comfortable, and safe in the presence of a stranger. As conversation moves to deeper issues - like your fears, life challenges, and insecurities - you will continue to feel affirmed. It will set up a new pattern of confidence and feeling validated. You will see your true self, reflected in the people you meet... people who like you because of who you are!

The actual therapy will vary widely, according to your personal needs, so we will likely spend much of the first session talking, finding rapport and a common understanding of your needs and fears. Many have had distressing experiences in past relationships, so conversations are based on "trauma informed care" - an awareness that the conversation may evoke distressing feelings, and a skill set to manage these toward healing.

Others may experience difficulty trusting, receiving kindness or compliments, being seen and heard, asking, saying no (or yes), setting boundaries... a raft of skills that are so important in life, but especially in intimate relationships. We practice these, not in role-play but with authentic conversations and interactions where you can feel challenged and transcend your fears.

As an embodied therapist, I mostly work with mindful awareness of body sensations; this is the most direct way to "feel at home in your own skin". Sensation is a reflection of emotion... consider a "sinking feeling in the stomach" or "skin crawling". When we can be truly comfortable with the sensations of the body, we can feel whole, at ease, and confident... these are really attractive qualities that will allow you to shine.

“What point is a loving partner if we cannot receive love”

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About Me

"Every human being deserves to feel safe, free to express themselves, sovereign in their own body, and able to make confident choices in life".

These are the four pillars of my practice but the text has also become my personal statement of universal human rights, and my wish for every person within every relationship.

My favourite thing in the world is to facilitate life-affirming experiences between strangers - hosting travellers, making introductions, running workshops, and community events. The common thread... bringing nervous people together and watching them shine in each other's company.

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